Internet Guidelines
Using the Internet for Adoption
The internet has become a large adoption arena. It takes caution and tact to utilize the benefits of the internet in your adoption search.
GUIDELINES:
1. Do not give out your whole name, phone number or address on the internet….chat rooms, message boards, email groups, etc.
2. Do NOT go to Birthmother support groups/boards and approach birthmothers about considering your family for adoption. That is a BIG turn off to the birthmoms and you have a 99% chance of them running from you, not considering you. Those sites are for birthmother SUPPORT, they know where to go to find families, and they shouldn't have to deal with "solicitations" on support groups/boards. You can recommend sites to go to for help, support and waiting families, if they are asking. It can be a site you are listed on. If it is meant to be, they will find you.
3. ALWAYS be careful working with facilitators/agencies/attorneys and birthmoms. Get references. There are a lot of scams that go on. Never give a birthmother money directly. In many states that is illegal and could result in you losing custody of the child. Check out facilitators, agencies and attorneys-make sure they are legitimate and have a good track record. There are lots of message boards on the web to find out others experiences with particular places, people and birthmoms. You can also go to the Better Business Bureau and check out if there are any complaints. You can check their licensing with their state. You can also do a background check at http://www.knowx.com. It costs $10.00 for each search…but could save you a lot down the road. Ask around on the net and other agencies and adoptive parents.
4. Utilize places to post your Dear Birthmother letter. Some places are free, others cost a fee. Compare around. Do what you can afford. Also look at how busy the site is and how many families a birthmom will have to sort through to find you. Do they have some kind of search tool that allows a birthmom to find specific families easily, or is she going down a list of 300 names?
5. If you choose to go with an agency, facilitator, attorney, or directly with a birthmother, a contract is an essential. Most places will not work with you unless you have some kind of contract. Other than agencies and attorneys, there are places like TLA Adoptions, Heaven Sent Adoptions and United Adoption Resources that have you sign a contract. It protects you and them. Read all contracts and make sure you understand them. Those places are working to help you adopt and should be compensated for their time and work.
Adopting Older Children | Adoption Plan/Contract | Adoptive Breastfeeding | After Adoption | Appropriate Adoption Language | Are We Ready to Adopt? | Attachment Issues | Books on Adoption | Choosing an Agency/Facilitator/Attorney | Creating a Family Website | Cross-Culture Adoption | Developing a Dear Birthmother Letter/Website | Developing a Relationship with your Child's Birthparents | Fostercare | ICPC | Internet Guidelines | Parenting | Placement Risk Factors | Preparing For A Homestudy | Subsidies | Transracial Adoption | Verifying / Interviewing Birthmothers